New Trauma Center clips demonstrate the horrors of life on the street

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We’ve all been there.

You’re driving down the streets of Las Vegas after a Tyson fight, Suge is at the wheel, and as you pull up to a stop light a whole gang of ni***s in a white Caddy pop off 12-13 shots through the door of your Beemer. You’re hit, fatally wounded and go on to make more money posthumously than you ever did while you were alive. It’s a common story, really.

If only medical professionals could take a cue from videogames, the rap game wouldn’t be so damn dangerous. For instance, the above video from the upcoming Wii title Trauma Center: New Blood teaches kids how to treat gunshot wounds, a valua💃ble life skill in any pr💎ofession.

Also, hit the jump for a clip demonstrating how easy it is to treat “attack wounds”, even those suspiciously similar to the wounds suffered by Nicole Brown Simpson. I’m not going to claim The Juice is innocent, but if a child can work that kinda magic on a corpse, what the hell is wrong with Los Angeles?

Free Mumia! 


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Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.