A decade later

[Author's note: This is a community blog I wrote almost eight years ago. With only days away from the release of Animal Crossing: New Horizons, and only a week away from our ninth wedding anniversary, it seemed fitting to revisit this story, with years and dates updated.]

Almost ten years ago, I asked a special woman to spend the rest of her life with me. This is the story of it all. I've told it to friends, I've told it on Podtoid, and I've w??ritten up an old community blog that is all broken and busted due to the constant onward march of the internet.

It started almost 15 years ago, in the summer of 2005. I worked in a laboratory in college, and so did she. Our desks were near each other, and in between experiments, we would help each other out with online crossword puzzles, mahjong solitaire, and ShyGypsy's Funny Farm puzzle. She was cute, and I felt comfortable talking to her, which is something I struggled with when it came to most other people.

One day I invited her over to my apartment to hang out and play video games. My roommates and I were broke college kids, and we lived in an old house in upstate New York, so we kept the thermostat at a chilly 50 degrees Fahrenheit. It wasn't the most welcoming environment, but I was able to use it as an excuse to snuggle up on the couch and play Clubhouse Games with my soon-to-be girlfriend. She seemed to enjoy it and particularly l?iked my Nintendo DS.

I don't remember what exactly spurred her to get one of her own, but soon enough, she had a DS Lite, along with her own copy of Clubhouse Games and New York Times Crosswords?. Meanwhile, I had taken her to see opera excerpts at the local? symphony hall, taken her out to a teppan dinner for her birthday, and finally worked up the nerve to give her a kiss.

Things went well for the next few months, but then we had to face an unfortunate truth: I was graduating and moving to California for grad school; she was finished with her work and moving back to Mississippi. Our first summer apart was difficult, though we talked daily. I sent her a gift of a game I thought she may enjoy: Animal Crossing: Wild World. With each of us on ??our DSes, we were able to run around town together, catching fish, gifting items, and making hearts appear above our heads. It wasn't quite the same as snuggling together?? on a couch, but it was better than just talking on the phone.

We spent a year apart, though we saw ea??ch other about once a month. Sometimes she'd visit me in California, sometimes I'd visit her in Mississippi. Othe??r times we met in entirely different locations. Every time we met we talked about when we'd be together again. After that first year, she quit her job in Mississippi and moved out to California to join me.

Two years passed, and over that time, I played Animal Crossing less and less. I always wanted to play the latest releases, and I tried getting her into other games, but nothing ever really stuck with her. She was content to play Animal Crossing, visiting her town and d??igging up fossils on a dai??ly basis.

It was then that I started planning how I would ask her to marry me. I wanted it to be something personal to both of us, something we would both remember forever. The decision was obvious: I would ask her through Animal Crossing.?? But I couldn't just do something small; it needed to be great.

My first idea was to bury letters, sending her on a scavenger hunt, finding each letter one by one, until the last one had the question. To my c??hagrin, I realized that it's impossible to bury letters, so that idea was mostly scr?apped. I still wanted to do a scavenger hunt, but I had to be creative with it.

For weeks I bought red roses whenever I saw them on sale in Nookington's. They would be instrumental to the plan. I created an alternate character on my copy of Animal Crossing named Mysterio, who strangely looked a lot more like I do than my main character did. With Mysterio, I boug??ht a bottle mail, filled it out, chucked it into the ocean, and then went to her town so it would show up on her shores. While I was there, I wrote her a letter and lef?t it with Pelly to deliver later. I had Mysterio return to my town, then go back to hers. I searched the beaches to find my bottle mail, then I got to work gardening, and posted a message on her bulletin board. Everything was set.

Oh yeah, I also bought a ring. Then everything was set.

At the time, I was ??working a job that let me stay up late and sleep in until noon, so we only occasionally fell asleep together. That night, after she went off to bed, I turned off the TV and followed her in. She still played every night, to the point that she had actually conditioned herself such that the 9:00 pm music causes her to fall asleep. She was facing away from me when she started playing, and I watched over her shoulder.

Immediately after she exited her house, she heard the whirr of a UFO and saw Gulliver flying overhead. She ran to try and catch him, but her aim was ??off and she missed her chance at knocking him out of the sky with her slingshot. Flustered, she saved her game and closed her DS Lite. My engagement plans were about to be ruined by an anthropomorphic seagull. "Hang on," I said, ??"I think you had mail to check," hoping I wasn't being completely obvious.

She seemed a little confused that I was interested in her reading her mail, but she opened her DS back up and restarted the game. She looked in her mailbox and saw a letter from Myst?erio, telling her that something important had washed up on the shore of Dogtown. Intrigued, she set off south to the beach, and combed it, until she found an arrow of red roses pointing to the bottle mail. I had to cut down one of her ?coconut trees to plant that arrow. Inside the bottle mail, the message instructed her to go read the town's bulletin board.

She trekked back north, toward City Hall, where she found the following message on the bulletin board. Meanwhile, I ha?d stealthily grabbed the ring from inside my nightstand and waited.

She rolled over with excitement in her eyes. Almost ten years ago, I asked a?? special woman to spend the rest of her life with me. She said yes.

The post A very Animal Crossing engagement story appeared first on Destructoid.

A clever workaround for players who don't enjoy combat

I'm fine with fighting creatures in Stardew Valley as a means to an end, but I know plenty of players who would prefer not to engage with the mines if given a satisfying alternative. A new mod for the PC version of Stardew Valley, Pacifist Valley, is an on-brand solution – a way to progress but not skip.

The mod doesn't let you talk to monsters, become friends, and form alliances, but you can hug them. It "replaces all?? weapons with hearts, feathers, stuffed animals, and other nonviolent love devices."

According to creator aedenthorn, the goal is to "turn Stardew Valley into a more peaceful place by removing deadly violence from the game." With the mod installed, you'll "attack" with "kissing and heart emoting," and "slain" monsters will fall in love with you (while sti??ll award??ing XP and item drops).

Instead of leveli?ng up the usual combat sk?ill, you'll become more proficient at cuddling.

The more I think about it, the more I could see Eric Barone offering his own version of this one day. The Stardew Valley creator has his hands full and then some, but it seems like something he'd be super into.

Pacifist Valley [Nexus Mods via Rock, Paper, Shotgun]

The post Pacifist Valley is a nonviolent mod for Stardew Valley’s mines appeared first on Destructoid.

Serenade by K.K. Slider not included

If you have an Animal Crossing-lovin' pal that you've been feeling the hots for, then Nintendo is trying to make it that little bit easier for you to declare your crush this Valentine's Day. All you need do is send them one of th??ese cards dedicated to your sweetheart's favourite game, and then requited feelings, intense passion and Happy Ever After is 100% guaranteed.*

The six cards are available to download for free over at the Play Nintendo site. You just need to pick out your favourite, print it out, write your sweet nothings inside and feel pretty good about yourself, (it's all about you, after all). But, jesting aside, hopefully these cute cards will help even the shyest neighbour share their feelings with the Isabelle, K.K. Slider, or Rover in their life. I mean, even Tom Nook has gotta have an inkling of roma??nce in his cold, conservative heart... right?.. RIGHT?

Once the romance is out of the way, you can get back to the important business of video games. In particular, preparing yourself for the launch of Animal Crossing: New Horizons, which arrives on Nintendo Switch March 20.

_{*not remotely guaranteed.}

//tw?itter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1225132255007383554?s=2??0

The post Love thy neighbour with these cute Animal Crossing Valentine’s Day cards appeared first on Destructoid.

Double Trouble

Respawn's super-popular battle royale title Apex Legends is feeling the luuuurve of the Valentine's season, and will - for a brief time - be offering players the opportu??nity to tag up with that special someone on their next chaotic run through The Frontier.

From today until February 18, "Duos" will return to Apex Legends on all platforms, letting players take on the all and sundry with a running buddy of their choosing. Not only that, but teams of two playing this event will also earn double XP, to a daily cap of 20K. As a memento of the romantic, corpse-filled encounter, players engaging in Duos will also receive a cute Valentin??e'??s badge, as pictured below.

Duos mode debuted in Apex Legends late last year, where it was warmly received by the fanbase, who were disappointed that it wasn't a permanent fixture. So there's little doubt that this weekend will see players leap on the opportunity to buddy-up once again. And if you don't ha??ve an in-game partner??, just jump in anyway with a fellow wallflower.

After ?all, love can bloom, even on the battlefiel??d.

Apex Legends is available now on PS4, PC, and Xbox One.

Duos ret??urn to Apex Legend??s as part of Valentine's Day celebrations [Eurogamer]

The post Apex Legends Valentine’s Day event sees the return of Duos appeared first on Destructoid.

The second of a planned trilogy

A few months ago I did the Lord's work by reporting on a tabletop RP??G based off of the music of Carly Rae Jepsen. I also shared a sad, sad story of remorse a??nd regret regarding the immaculately poor decision to not go see her in concert. My days have been?? haunted by the ghost of what could have been, tormenting me at every turn. Bound by my own mourning, I have been a shell of my old self.

I'm hap??py to announce that as of Tuesday, July 23, I will have rid myself of this curse and seen my queen live in concert. I bought VIP tickets to her show in Raleigh, NC, so I'll get to see her sound check, do a Q&A, take a group photo, and get a signed poster. Only one thing could finally complete my arc of redemption: Talking about a new Carly Rae tabletop game.

Thank you, Colin Cummings, for creating to Black Heart.

In Colin's first outing, Boy Problems, players were tasked with infiltrating a secure vault to free the 200+ unreleased Carly Rae tracks some greedy, rich dick was hoarding. In this quasi-kinda-a??lmost sequel, things have taken a turn for the worse. The Ancient Goddess has slumbered for far too long, and you and your cult of fanatic CRJ followers must perform the sacred rites in order to rais?e Her from her confines and unleash Her onto the world.

It's not that easy, though, as the normal townsfolk are scared and superstitious. They listen to Kid Rock and are easily frightened by the empowerment and energy brought on by the one true goddess of pop. You have seven days to convince them by solving mysteries by day and spreading The Power of Truth at nightly town hall meetings. Upgrade your Heart, Soul, Min?d, and Weird to ease your task. Bring them to our side, and perform the final ritual in an attempt to resurrect Her.

Yes, this game has a Weird stat. The Weirder you get, the more powers you get -- and yes, those powers are based off of Carly Rae's lyrics. Weird channels through you, strengthening you, but can also tear apart reality. Take it from me; I know this feeling all t??oo well.

Boy Problems and Black Heart represent the first two entries in a planned trilogy of tabletop RPGs based off of Carly Rae Jepsen's incredible music. If Patreon is your kinda thing, you can support creator Colin Cummings to gain access to early builds, developer notes, Q&A sessions, an?d instant down??loads of his newest ventures. I resisted its wiles the first go around, but I succumbed today. I couldn't go another day without supporting this kind of ingenuity. What can I say? This speaks to me.

I know it's a tough world out there, but at least we have this?. Hold onto it folks; keep it sacred.

The post In your Black Heart is where you’ll find the newest Carly Rae Jepsen TTRPG appeared first on Destructoid.

Now this is what it's like when worlds collide

Muv-Luv is a collection of the first two entries in a trilogy of visual novels. The first part, Muv-Luv Extra, is basically a slice of life harem anime on the surface. The sequel, Muv-Luv Unlimited, is an epic, mech-filled sci-fi story. Make no mistake, while these two narratives are seemingly-unrelated, they're very much two sides of the exact same?? coin.

Muv-Luv (PC, PS Vita [reviewed])
Developer: ixtl Inc.
Publisher: PQUBE Limited
Released: June 12, 2018
MSRP: $39.99 (PS Vita)/$29.99 (PC)

It’s worth noting this originally released about fifteen years ago and some of the story beats and humor haven’t aged extremely well. All of the female characters are, essentially, presented as conquests. They’re fully fleshed out (heh) characters, but the main goal of the game is to eventually sleep with them. Considering Muv-Luv initially debuted with a plethora of gratuitous sex scenes for each romanceable girl, that&?rsquo;s hardly surprising.

While there’s still a bit of fan service here and there in the western release, all of the full-frontal nudity has been taken out. You know what’s crazy? When you strip this thing of all that sexy fluff, it holds up remarkably as a tried and true tale of romance. If I hadn’t already known about the naughty bits being removed, I’d have never even noticed. I’m typically agai?nst most censorship of any kind, but these stories are so damn wonderful and heartfelt that it feels inconsequential in the grand scheme of things.

Muv-Luv Extra is, more or less, a straightforward love story and it’s the most divisive entry in the series by a long s?hot. Takeru, the main character, is thrust into the path of a group of ladies and your only real goal here is to choose one as a romantic partner. He wakes up one day to find a blue-haired girl mysteriously lying in bed beside him and events quickly spiral out of control from? there.

Sumika, Takeru'??s closest friend since childhood, finds the two of you together, and she's pissed. She wants blood. Between her and the blue-haired lady, Meiya, you'll have to attempt to keep the peace. Both of them are vying for your attention, and more characters erupt later to further complicate matters. Our respective Don Juan, Takeru, will have to fend off their advances while attempting to live a somewhat normal high school life.

In this newest version, you’re presented with the option to skip Extra altogether, but doing so would be a great disservice. Not only is it absolutely essential to the storyline of Unlimited, but it&rs??quo;s a delightfully naïve experience in its own right. At the very least, playing through the Sumika and Meiya routes are necessary to fully understand the depth of events to come. It might seem like lovey-dovey, skippable nonsense, but it successfully sets up a story arc that simply couldn’t be told in any other way. 

Unlimited, the sequel, retains many of Extra's romantic themes, but i??t takes place in a dystopian future where humanity is on the brink of extinction. The small portion of the population that remains is left fighting for survival, w??ith the help of badass mechs, against a mysterious alien species. It’s impossible to go into more details without spoiling anything, but I can assure you it’s fucking awesome.

The way that these two stories twist, blend, and mirror each other is pretty damn impressive. The plot and characters may not always be completely realized, but there’s something special here. By the time Unlimited’s credits were rolling, I had fallen head-over-heels for this world and the people who inhabit it. However, if you don’t enjoy reading, you’re going to have a bad time.&n??bsp;

This a visual novel in the purest sense of the term. If you’re not familiar with the genre, this is a largely passive experience. You'll occasionally answer a few questions, and those will decide which ending you receive. It's always obvious which girl's route you're choosing, so you won't ?have to worry about accidentally getting the wrong ending.

These two games are mostly exposition, but they lead to a third act, Muv-Luv Alternative, which delivers an unexpected amount of nuance. Every seemingly-frivolous event shown here is full of intention. Muv-Luv may have dropped its perverted past, but rest assured its unwillingness to compromise on the things tha??t matter is more than evident in its delivery. It knows exactly what it is, and it’s completely unashamed.

This is not a game for the faint of heart. It’s offensive, perverted, and subtly violent at times during its opening moments. It’s also adorable, funny, and heartwarming in equ??al measure. It’s a complicated beast that rewards those wh??o persevere. While far from perfect, it lays the foundation for one of the most epic sci-fi stories ever told. There is nothing else like it.

_{[This review is based on a retail build of the game provided by the publisher.]}

The post Review: Muv-Luv appeared first on Destructoid.

#GameOn

Last week, The White House YouTube channel uploaded a video titled "Violence in Video Games". The video featured an 88-second edit of some of the most violent gaming footage its makers could find (and ??apparently ?only from games that came out years ago.)

Organisation Games for Change, who constantly push for positive impact through our favourite medium, have uploaded their own 88-second edit of video game footage, ??albeit one with a somewhat different choice of shots and resu??ltant tone, and its sublime.

I'm not going to waste any?? more time pontificat??ing. Enjoy.

The post Games for Change create counter-point to White House ‘Gaming Violence’ video appeared first on Destructoid.

The true bride and groom are here

Nintendo has announced that the second DLC pack for Fire Emblem Warriors will be arriving on February 14 at 4PM PT. While some of the contents were known?? beforehand, the curtain has been pulled back on what exactly will be in the DLC. The company also confirmed that it will be $8.99 USD if you do not own the season pass.

Love is certainly in the air with the ?new costumes.

Four new costume??s will be in the DLC pack, ?and none of them belong to the DLC characters this time. Marth and Caeda will receive a groom and bride costume respectively, Tiki receives a dress, while Lyn will be receiving a Swordmaster costume. These are very strong picks to say the least, and the idea of pairing up Marth and Caeda in their wedding getup as a battle couple is just fun.

The DLC also contains the characters Navarre, Minverva, and Linde, with new unique skills. Navarre's 'Lone Wolf' increases damage when solo, while Minverva comes with Iote's Shield to negate super effective attacks, which will be a godsend for flying units against archers. Linde's ability will allow her to fill the Awakening Gauge by d??efeating enemies with critical attacks, regardless of what the weapon triangle says. The one word of caution here is that the last DLC pack had two clones, so if you haven't committed yet then wait for footage to be safe.

The rest is nearly the same as the previous DLC. New support conversations will be present, new history maps, new armor break models, and new weapon attributes. Those abilities are Starflip, which changes strength and defense along with magic and resistance, genpeer, which increases damage a??gainst characters of the same gender, and decreases damage against characters of the opposite gender, and gencross, which is the opposite of genpeer.

There is one important detail however. The broken armor models include Lyn, Celica, and Anna. In addition, Caeda, Tiki and Anna will get unique weapons in the DLC. This means that there likely will not be anything for Lyn, Celica, and Anna in the Awakening DLC pack, but also that the Awakening cast without unique weapons, like Robin and Li??ssa, will be receiving their own.

In addition to the DLC, Update 1.4.0 will drop and will have content available to everyone. The cha??racter level will be increased from 110 to 130, and more blessings will be available. On top of that, two more weapon attributes are being added, which increase the amount an enemy's stun gauge decreases by and increases the damage done to launched enemies respectively. Finally some quality-of-life changes are being made, such as UI improvements, with the deployment screen being specified, as well as an option to turn off the confirmation for crest creation.

There is one thing still absent from the game: the villains remain unplayable. By this point Hyrule Warriors already had its villains patched in, so it's not clear why this hasn't happened yet. ??Hopefully it does before the final DLC pack.

[Fire Emblem Warriors]

The post Love comes to Fire Emblem Warriors with DLC Pack #2 on Valentine’s Day appeared first on Destructoid.

How does that make you feeeeel?

I’ve got a lot to say about this, but let me squeeze out the “news” portion of the article first, before I start gushing. Stick it to The Man is heading to the Nintendo Switch on November 23, 2017. It&rsquo?;ll feature HD Rumble, Pro Controller support, and a price point of $11.99 when it launches. 

Th??e story revolves around a hard hat tester (This is exactly what it sounds like. They drop shit on his head while he’s wearing different hats…) named Ray who gets hit on the head by an object that falls out of the sky and grants him the ability to read the minds of others as well as influence them through the use of a big, pink “spaghetti arm” that sticks out from his brain. Character’s desires appear in thought bubbles that contain “stickers,” and you’ll swap them around between NPCs to solve various puzzles involving things like dentures, divas, seagulls, and a dead mouse. It's exactly as ridiculous as it sounds.

As many of you are no doubt aware, I’m a little bit obsessed with this game. No exaggeration, it’s easily in my top five of all time due to its fantastic writing. It’s all just so gloriously dumb that I can’t help but love it. When I found out, several months back, that Ryan North, the writer of Unbeatable Squirrel Girl, was also behind the story of Stick it to The Man, it blew my fragile, little mind. Two of my favorite things, across two separate forms of media, can be traced back to this guy. Hell, I even got a hand drawn picture of the Destructoid Robot featured in a Marvel comic book -- in the Letters From Nuts column of Squirrel Girl issue 19 -- before I got a job here! Needles??s to say, I was pretty stoked about it.

Mr. North and Zoink! have recently teamed up again to deliver, the “spiritual successor” to Stick it to The Man, Flipping Death which is scheduled for an early 2018 release. Supposedly, the first game isn’t required reading for it, but there are going to be plenty of jokes for returning fans sprinkled throughout. They're stand-alone stories but have a “shared universe," and Ray, the protagonist from the original, is even featured in the trailer for Flipping Death as a ghost! Spooky!

If you never got around to playing this gem when it first came out, I highly recommend giving it a shot. Don’t just take my word for it though. Destructoid even gave this beauty a 9.5 in its review back? in 2013. Hopefully, this release will deliver the same level of quality on the Switch. 

The post Stick it to The Man on Switch this month appeared first on Destructoid.

'I've been too busy having all the sex'

In what can only be considered a monumental mistake, Xbox gamer Ray 'Stallone83' Cox lost his 'highest Gamerscore' world record, which he has held for eleven years straight, after he stopped gaming momentarily? to have marital relations ??with the love of his life.

The tragedy occurred this weekend as Ray, in a rare display of amateurishness, married his beautiful fiancee Cindy before jetting?? off for an exciting honeymoon. This foolhardy decision allowed St??ephen 'smrnov' Rowe to overtake him and claim the title, popping a new gamerscore record just shy of 1.6 million.

Rowe has stated he has no interest in officially registering his score with Guinness World Records, rightly so, as it's All About The Games. In the meantime Cox, who for some reason isn't cutting his honeymoon short despite this news, is?? expected to get back in the hunt for the top-spot once ??he returns home.

Well, hope it was worth it, Ray...hope i??t was worth it...

Gamerscore world record broken [Xbox Achievements]

I've been too busy having all the sex. pic.twitter.com/aFNpwuaDY1

— Ray Cox IV (@Stallion83) July 4, 2017

The post Husband and wife co-op week?end ruins world record Gamerscore appeared first on Destructoid.

The Destructoid staff opens their hearts

It's John Wick Chapter 2 weekend and that means Valentine's Day is just a few days away. For some, that day will be spent sharing romantic mome??????????????????????????nts, flowers, chocolates, lingerie, and disappointing sex with the one you love. For me, it will be Tuesday.

Even though I've been criminally sing?le for the past 13 years, I'm always optimistic that love is right around the corner. My spirit is kept up with movies about falling in love, TV shows about pe?ople in love and video games where the protagonist risks his or her life to save their one true love.

Yes, I am that pathetic, but this week and the build-up to another lonely night got me?? thinking about gaming and love. Video games are often looked down upon for their poor story telling but I think many of us at one point or another have found ourselves completely immersed in the passion shared between two pixilated characters. In honor of Valentine's Day, I wanted to know what the Destructoid staff considered to be their favorite video game love story.

Oh, and be warn?ed: this article contains spoilers.

Chris Carter

Now that Berserk and the Band of the Hawk is a game, I'm allowed to talk about the manly love between Griffith and Guts. It's a friendship that begins with the former dislocating the latter's shoulder, followed by an utterance of the phrase "now you belong to me," and some naked horseplay. Berserk is oddly heartwarming at times, but it quickly diffuses any sem??blance of hope in any given scene and relies on a sense of grimdarkness that other stories only wish they could pull off.

The original anime (not the truncated movies) and the manga are able to painstakingly build up their relationship to a believable level, which makes the painful events that follow all the more heartbreaking. The game mostly gets that right, focusing roughly 10 of its 20 hours on the Golden Age Arc and their friendship.

ShadeOfLight

As someone who isn't exactly experienced in love and romance, I nevertheless like a go??od love story in my games. However, I'm not someone who easily buys into "main character and his designated love interest". I don't like love stories that feel arbitrary or forced. If characters need to end up together, I need to see touching ??shared moments, genuine bonding and more subtlety than "we're in this war together, let's make out".

To the Moon pro??vided that better than any other game I've seen. We follow the story of Johnny and his wife River from an early age all the way through until a long-lasting marriage, an?d it hit all the right notes for it to feel real to me.

Johnny first? became interested in River because she was aloof and quiet, and a little interesting and mysterious as a result. After an awkward date invitation (and an even more awkward actual date), we see the relationship between the two naturally grow and prosper. Despite having to deal with psychological and medical issues, the two remain utterly committed to each other, until ultimately death does them part.

Theirs ?is easily one of the most touching stories I remember from any video game.

Jonathan Holmes

I'm going with Chu Lip (or as some type it, Chu<3Lip), and not just because I just wrapped up a 3 part interview series with the game's creator. I'm choosing Chu Lip because it??'s the only game I've ever played where your main goal is to love everyone in town.

Just as in real life, mass seduction doesn't come easy here. Smooching all fifty of your love interests (including a giant frog, a Dtoid-style robot, and a reanimated pile of cremated ashes) takes over 7 hours, even for master pick-up artists. 

In the ??immortal words of Martin 'Marti??n' Lawrence ~ "Damn, Gina." 

Niero

Rolf and Nei from Phantasy Star II. Rolf isn't in roman?tic love with Nei, they were more like bros from another Mother Brain. The way shit goes down in that game has left me scarred for life, and cautiously optimistic about my future hyper-strong robot waifs. Also, I have to cite very old games because I've lost all feeling in my chest since the Clinton administration.

CJ Andriessen

Love come??s in many shapes and sizes. Something the person you think you'll end up with isn't who you thought it'd be. Sometimes the person you fall in love with isn't even a person, but a line of code programmed to be the perfect girlfriend. And sometimes the person you fall in love with is someone you buy at a store.

Okay, this is getting weird, but when I look at the many love stories I've seen in gaming, the one that always brings a smile to my face is that of Sal 9000 and his girlfriend Nene Anegasaki, one of the stars of the never-localized Love Plus for the Nintendo DS. You might have heard about this when it happened: a J?apanese man is so in love with his virtual girlfriend, he broadcasts their wedding ceremony over the internet. It was cute, it was weird, it was decidedly Japanese.

Life sucks, and it sucks more each and every day. All of us look for ways to find happ?iness in life and this guy found happiness in a girl who only exists as a few thousand 1s and 0s perfectly sequenced to his liking. That's a type of happiness I can only dream of finding in my ?life.

Kevin McClusky

As I've gotten older, I find that love stories that demonstrate dedication and commitment resonate more with me than stories of burning hot passion. It's harder to find a more dedicated couple than Guybrush Threepwood and Elaine Marley from the Monkey Island series of adventure games. They've stayed together through five adventures, and both parties have been dead, zombified, or worse on multiple occasions. Through it all, they stay utterly devo?ted to one another. It's hard to find someone who'll stay with you through a full body transformation, but their relationship has been tested by far more ?than that!

Despite the constant challenge to their union posed by the villainous LeChuck, Guybrush and Elaine have never wavered and face all their challenges together. Although each of the Monkey Island games features? Guybru??sh as a protagonist, Elaine is always there in the background and is usually depicted as far more competent than her partner. It's pretty clear Elaine wears the pants in their relationship, but Guybrush is just happy to see his Plunder Bunny after a long day on the Caribbean seas.

It's been interesting seeing their relationship grow from love at first sight in The Secret of Monkey Island to their marriage in Curse of Monkey Island and a comfortable domestic life in Escape From Monkey Island and the TellTale series. From pixels to paintings to polygons, the Monkey Island series provides a templ??ate for long-term relationships that I hope I can live up to.

Peter Glagowski

Twilight Princess may not be the best Zelda game out there, but it did some cool things to try and better explain the world in which you inhabit. One of those details was the setup for the game's best dungeon, Snowpeak Ruins. You weren't simply going into some long abandoned mine shaft and poking around but were invited into?? the home of some yetis to help them.

Yeto, the gargantuan guy in the picture, nabbed one of t?he pieces of the Mirror of Twilight as a gift for his wife, Yeta. This, in turn, turned their home into a mess and gave his wife a sickness. As you're roaming around trying to figure out the cause of their blight, Yeto is in the kitchen brewing a soup for his beloved. Each time you bring him an ingredient, he shoves you over and immediately throws that sucker into the soup.

The boss battle for the dungeon culminates when you find the key to their bedroom and the Mirror fragment possesses Yeta. After knocking sense into her and removing the blight from their home, Yeto comes in to hold his frail wife. She is initially upset that she lost the gift from her husband, but he consoles her and tells her, "Look into eyes of Yeto. There true beauty." They then embrace and culminate in a flurry of hearts and a he??art container.

Say what you will about how elongated the tutorials of Twilight Princess? are or how much needless bloat there is between dungeons, Snowp?eak Ruins' bittersweet tale of a loving couple makes the game.

Cory Arnold

There's an infinite number of ways to extract meaning from anything, including games, depending on your experiences and what you are looking for. That is especially true of artistic media like Ico that are less explicit than their? colleagues and even go so far as to leave things to the audience's interpretation. So whether you took Ico and Yorda's relationship? to be romantic or not, an undeniable bond was forged between the two.

Throug?hout the game, Ico must escort Yorda safely around the castle a??s they attempt to escape from their imprisonment. Yorda is mostly useless, doing little beyond opening the occasional gate in return for Ico who is working tirelessly to save her. Therefore Ico, controlled by the player, must not only create safe passage for Yorda but literally hold her hand and guide her, requiring the player to hold R1 while doing so. 

Many people point to the ending as the big emotional moment, but in my opinion, the most important and moving moment is a quick one. Somewhere around the middle or perhaps the second half of the game, Ico and Yorda reac??h the bridge leadin?g out of the castle. Turns out they can't escape and the bridge starts to split, with Ico and Yorda on either ?side. Ico attempts to leap back across and is falling short when suddenly Yorda's ?hand appears and catches him.

He still falls, but her reaching for him is the moment she finally returns the favor, grabbing his hand instead of the other way around, possibly a metaphor for returning love. This is the culmination of all the hard work Ico put in for her and ?the entire game's premise of connecting the player to Yorda. The ending would not have as much of an impact ??without the bridge scene.

While there are a lot of true romances to choose from including Tidus and Yuna in Final Fantasy X and definitely a lot of joke answers to go with, that one moment in Ico resonated with? me than any other moment in games.

Robo Panda Z

The correct answer, though, was the friendship between Undyne ?and Papyrus.

Patrick Hancock

Man, I've been thinking about this question all week and couldn't come up with much. The first thing that came to mind was the familial love that I had for Nanako while playing Persona 4. There are many touching moments in that game, but only one, which involves Nanako, brought tears to my eyes. It's a different kind of love than this post was going for, but damn if I didn't feel like a big bro to Na?nako.

Then it hit me: Catherine! Definitely not a role-model story of love, but a very adult one. Love and lust are the main themes while playing and the beauty about Catherine is how those elements are explored through the puzzle-climbing aspects of the gameplay. Imagery and difficulty are aplenty, perfectly representing what Vincent is going through. Love is explored in other ways too, like the relationship between Erica and Toby or the sheep's stories in the landings. The best part about Catherine is how fully the? ideas of love?? are explored, instead of just being some lovey-dovey kiss-kiss smooch-smooch hugfest.

*****

Those are the loves that we love. Let us know in the comments what lov??e stories you consider to be the best video games have to offer.

The post What is gaming’s greatest love story? appeared first on Destructoid.

Why explore Tokyo when you can tour it on a computer in a Tokyo apartment?

Wait, the original Go Go Nippon came out in 2011? I thought it came out in 2014. Guess that explains why there's no article of this on Destructoid. Well, if you never played Go Go Nippon and have any interest in Japan or visual novels, now's ??a great time to give it a go. The 2016 version will release on November 11 on Steam for $19.95 ($7.95 for the new content if you already own the base game) with tons of new content, including all the content added in the 2015 version. Wait, there was content released last year!? 

Those not familiar with the game and clicked on this article anyway might be surprised to find that this game is actually pretty good as far as visual novels go. I linked to Josh's review, but I also played it myself. You play as a foreigner studying Japanese who goes to Japan for a week to?? stay a??t his pen pals house. Those cool guys turn out to be cute girls, and well...yeah this is a romance game. 

The interesting spin here is that they act as tour guides, taking you to popular tourist destinations and telling you about the locations' history, activities you can?? do there, and how much they like you and don't want you to leave. Depending on where you go one of the two girls will accompany you, which is how your kanojo will be determined.

Did you know 'kanojo' means 'girlfriend' in Japanese? If you did, there's an extra incentive for you to play (I'm not the official MangaGamer spokesman or anything I swear). The dialogue of the entire game is written in both English and Japanese, so if you want to go down the long, dark path that is Japanese study you can get? some practice here.

The base game takes you to popular Tokyo locations such as Akihabara, Shibuya, Shinjuku, and Asakusa. The 2015 expansion adds Comiket, Tokyo Skytree, and Odaiba among others. Protip: Odaiba is the best date location in real life: calm island with a park, science museum, and a giant Gundam. Go Go Nippon 2016 will add less popular places like Ueno, Tokyo Station, and Rikugi Park. Maybe they should go outside T??okyo some more for ?the game, considering they do visit Kyoto, Yokohama, and Enoshima. A somewhat nearby city I really love is Nikko. Google it.

Japanese dialogue plus the fact that you play as a foreigner and are toured around famous places around Tokyo by cute anime girls makes me wonder if the Japanese National Tour Organization made this to promote travel. It's not exactly subtle, but it beats the hell out of that North Korean game where you drive around Pyongyang.

The game isn't all that long. I suggest giving it a whirl if you are even remotely interested. There is humor, accurate information on locations, and both the character and relationship development feel natural once you get past the initial "oh, its this character trope??" feeling. It won't blow your socks off, but it's charming.

_{[P.S. Akira is the best girl.]}

The post Let’s go go back to Go Go Nippon for more romance appeared first on Destructoid.

When the moon hits your eye like a shiny chrome pie, that's amore!

I don’t know about you, but I thought Fallout 4 was a thoroughly disappointi??ng experience. There’re too many problems to list with it, but sat atop that pile is a big, adorabl?e, scrap metal one: I can’t sleep with Nick Valentine.

Despite being a major NPC, Nick can’t be romanced at all. It doesn’t make much sense since you could bang a robot in New Vegas, but that’s the way it is. Or, rather, the way it was, thanks to the magic of modding.

Fallout 4 modder Shadowslasher410 has released a mod that allows you to get down and dirty with Valentine. It includes fully-voiced dialo??gue trees (which seem to be previously existing dialogue that’d just being reworked into a new context), and characters of any gender can hook up with him.

You can download the mod through Nexus or Bethesda.net. It’s recommended you start a new game, or at least reload a save where you hav?en’t already maxed out Nick’s affinity for you. 

Now if you excuse me, I have a sy??nth boyfriend ?to smooch.

The post At last, we can smooch Fallout 4’s Nick Valentine appeared first on Destructoid.

Says online dating site OKCupid

Do you ever find yourself playing video games for more than eight hours straight? If you answered ?yes, would you consider sleeping with -- or fucking -- a serial killer? According to OKCupid, 2??5 percent of you are likely to answer yes. 

OKCupid is basing this spooky factoid off an analysis of the thousands of questions users answer to find like-minded lovers. I've been on the site for years (having met my boyfriend there) an?d it is fascinating how honest some people are with their answers when marking them publicly visible.

Another gaming-related statistic released by OKCupid today states that if you play Dungeons & Dragons, you're 20% more likely to enjoy the taste of blood. By my count that means about 20% of D&D p?layers are serial killers, and 25% of the Dto?id staff would give them a poke.

Dark Matter A?n O??KCupid Analysis of Strange Human Traits [OKCupid]

The post Mar?athon gamers are 25??% more likely to consider sleeping with a serial killer appeared first on Destructoid.

#LoveWins

History was made today when the Supreme Court struck down bans against same-sex marriage, ruling that the Cons?titution guarantees a right to marriage for same-sex couples nationwide. Social media was immediately set ablaze with rainbows and cries of joy. The hashtag #LoveWins quickly spread across Twitter, and many gaming companies were eager to jump in and voice their support for the Supreme Court's ruling.

It's always great to know the companies that you love support good causes. Some changed their logos, others posted some fan art,?? and many more spread the hashtag. Here a??re a few companies who tweeted their support today.

The post Gaming companies voice their ??support for the same-sex marriage ruling i??n the US appeared first on Destructoid.

Promoted from our Community Blogs!

[Dtoid community member LuckRequired takes us on a stroll through his memories of the heyday of arcades. Those of us who frequented these electric churches of joy will be brought back swiftly to a simpler time. Want to see your own stuff appear on the front page? Go write something! --Occams Electric Toothbrush]

I love the glowing screens dotted about in a dark environment, like a s??tarry night sky, with no one telling you how bad the poor lighting is for your eyes. I love the stained, trodden, fatigued carpets that stick to your shoes as your skip from one arcade cabinet to the next. I love the chatter of cheers and groans as players react to their own or others performances. I love the myriad of sounds of produced by the games. The power-ups, the coin collecting and high scores dinging and pinging. It was a symphony unique unto itself. And I really love the sounds of coins clinking and clanging into slots, buttons being mashed and sticks waggling.

I love the challenge presented to you by th??at habitual passer by lurking fro?m afar who appreciates your ability to dethrone their hi-score and immediately tries to take it back, as well as the camaraderie that the best arcades breed.

I love missing those things because they were a large part of my youth and a very distinctive part of gaming history that has left me with some really fond memories. Stuff that only I can recall, but know others have reveled in too. Finally beating the first stage on one credit, defeat?ing that of wave of seemingly never-ending enemies, mastering my defenses and defeating that tricky credit devouring boss. And finally and perhaps mos??t rewarding was standing my ground against an army of player two challengers.

I love you arcade emporiums!

I listened to this while typing this out.

The post Monthly Musing: I Love Arcades appeared first on Destructoid.

Monthly Musing

[This month's Blogger Wanted comes from Luna Sy and is all about love and video games!]

This is the month of February. This is the month of ♥ L ♥ O ♥ V ♥ E ♥, and it's time to celebrate that.

As Frozen has taught us, true love can come in many different forms. There are many kinds of love, not just romantic that deserve acknowledgment. Video games have plenty of individual elements a??nd aspects that encourage and inspire us to express our deep love and admiration. You can love a certain character, a pairing, or even certain character traits. There maybe certain typ??es of game settings or art styles that you love. The music? The story? The game play? Those deserve some love too.

Effusiveness. Enthusiasm. Heartfelt feelings. That's what we're looking for this month. Again, GUSH. Gush about things you love. I'm sure you're all very good at gushing. To participate, just st??art a new community blog and title it "I love _______!" and elaborate your adoration towards that topic/thing/whatever! 

The post Gush about things you love this month appeared first on Destructoid.

Promoted from our Community Blogs

[Dtoid community blogger StriderHoang is thankful for his lady. Though distance may keep their bodies apart their love blooms in the world of Animal Crossing. Want to see your own stuff appear on the front page? Go write something! --Occams Electric Toothbrush]

Many of us have loved ones and we may envision sharing our passion of games with them. Many of us who have attempted may also be familiar with that feeling in your gut as you watch your loved one walk in circles trying to figure out the buttons. Years of playing games condition us to instinctively know the bottom-most button usually jumps and the left-most button performs an action. An instinct like this isn't something you just pick up quickly and no matter how much my girlfriend really does enjoy a game or two on her laptop or tablet, it's difficult? to find a game we can both enjoy together. She feels comfortable on smaller mobile games and I want to try a co-op game that may be beyond her current spatial awareness.

I knew she liked puzzle games because she played a ton on a flash cartridge for her Korean DS while she taught English abroad. I remember being excited for Call of Duty: World at War, to the extent that I took my girlfriend with me to buy it at launch and binge through the entire campaign while she just watched the spectacle. The first game I intimately shared with her was Crashmo for the Nintendo 3DS and while it was an instant hit, it wasn't something we could both enjoy. Sure, we've played games together before but it was usually amongst mutual friends as well. By the time I had bought a Nintendo 3DS though, I knew I was excited for Animal Crossing: New Leaf and had a long history with it. So I took a $200 risk: buy her the special edition Animal Crossing 3DS that had New Leaf pre-installed knowing she migh??t've hated this beloved franchise of?? mine that was already a niche within a niche.

In hindsight, the odds of her just playing it once and never playing it again were high.  I'd have forked over $200 for a 3DS with essentially pre-installed shovelware. But in a long distance relationship that you've made work, you look for every thing you can to shrink the distance a little: phone calls, texts, Skype, Facebook, and more but it's never enough. Until you figure out a practical solution to distance like a proper job or housing, you do what you have to. Playing Animal Crossing: New Leaf together over t?he internet was one more, albeit significant and expensive, option to shrinking that distance. Would she like playing it, let alone together?

It paid off though, and it paid off in spades.

Thanks to a dark pact with Nicolas Cage that is.

It wasn't as if I took a blind guess on it. Animal Crossing has cute, endearing animals to befriend and Animal Crossing isn't exactly a hard game to control. There's no hard failure state as you can live in a tiny house as long as you like with a loan that incurs no interest, never defaults, and will never lead adorable little animal thugs to find you and break your knees over a late payment. You're free to talk to animals and make friends or simply ignore them to further an agenda of cold hard cash bells. But just as there's no?? failure to get frustrated, there's no inherent goal. I couldn't predict whether or not she'd get tired of shaking her 20th fruit tree to earn money towards some sweet digital furniture. Of course the point isn't the intrinsic mechanics built into the game. The poi??nt is to play together!

We got to share stories and tips. I told her about selling native fruit in foreign towns and then we'd go to each others' towns to make bank. When Crazy Redd came into town with his stupid art, I'd help her figure out with painting was legit. Something I should've expected was just how deep into the game she'd get. Whenever she really likes something, she goes all in and its hard to pry her away. It happened with Tetris, it happened with Megopolis, and it certainly happened again. 

She started to plant her flowers and trees in methodical patterns. She'd complain that my flora was scattered around randomly and I replied that it was simply natural. She planted so many different ??fruit groves that that it'd put a Civil War era plantation to shame. She was definitely the hard working mayor who stumbled into town to my sort of hippie, surfer type mayor who just rolled into town and bums around with a juice box and a joint. Don't get me wrong, I definitely took pride in some interior decorating with themed rooms such as a trophy room, a jungle cabana, and an arcade. But while I was sitting on a cool two million bells at most, she stocked up on an ice cold 25 million bells.

Meanwhile, I had all the style!

The job market is tough and we still live a long ways off from each other in our home towns. We've even both gone back to school to figure out better opportunities. While I have a BA in Journalism (for some reason) and she has one in Creative Writing, we're now pursuing Networking and a teaching credential respectively; two areas that aren't going to experience any shrinking of jobs anytime soon. In the meantime, we've competed in bug catching competitions, gone island fishing, traded outfits, listened to a dog hold concerts, harvested million bell yields, trick-or-treated together, and more through Animal Crossing.

In particular we swooned over Kapp'n remarks on us as he took us to and from the island especially ("You better treat that Kitty O. well Marcel. She'd make a fine wife!"). She even had her own head canons much like my own.

She believed Bill the duck and Filbert the squirrel both adored her. Bill was a jock and would work out to impress her while Filbert would just be a goof and charm her with his vacuity. When it came time to install her police station box, she dropped Booker right between them, as if to help sort out their competitions. Of course, Booker isn't as assertive as Copper, so all it did was leave a timid Booker in between the two rivals' competitions. She had her own stable of favorites like Pudge the goofy bear and "if-Fonzie-were-a-koala" Eugene. Our fair share of neighbors would mo??ve from one town to another thanks to our continued visits and whenever someone new moved in, we'd immediately show them off knowing full well they couldn't be persuaded to? pack up and move to the other's town.

By the way, I wasn't kidding about the arcade room. I mean look at this piece of work.

These days both our time on New Leaf has cooled off considerably. I try to get on to pursue all the catchables I missed from last year but Super Smash Bros. 3DS came out and now I have a Wii U. Her schedule is pretty packed but I decided to get her Smash Bros. too. Last night she invited me to play Farmville 2, which is decidedly less scummy then the first Farmville and decent fun even as far as tablet games go. We still talk optimistically of our future together and someday soon I'll be too busy to play as much games as I'd wish but I'll still fondly remember those times when our mayors would just jump into a bed together and we'd just talk over the phone about our day before we get ready for bed. I wouldn't say Animal Crossing saved our relationship or anything but it does reconfirm my feelings that I have one hell of an awesome girlfriend and futur?e wife when I come home from work, ready to play some games and the first thing she as?ks is, "What's your premium at Re-Tail?"

Two souls, bound by the red string of fate, now journey on to your uncertain futures, but together.

The post Giving Thanks: Turning over a New Leaf appeared first on Destructoid.

Promoted from our Community Blogs!

_{[Dtoid community blogger bbain laments lost love. Want to see your own blog appear on our front page? Go write something! --Mr Andy Dixon]}

Hello everyone! Valentine's Day is today, and in the spirit of the holiday, I thought it might be fun to take a look at some of my favorite unrequited video game romances! These are instances where the game heavily hints at one character's attraction to the other, but neither character ever admits their feelings for one another. Their futures are left up ??to interpretation by the player, but I always hoped that these characters would end up together, even though it may have seemed very unlikely.

Also, if you think of any ?of your own examples, share your thoughts in the comments! Happy Valentine's Day!

Mega Man Volnutt and Tron Bonne - Mega Man Legends

It's not every day that the villain falls in love with the hero, but that's precisely what happens in Mega Man Legends. While scoping ou?t the island that she planned on attacking in the hopes of stealing treasure, Tron Bonne happened across Mega Man, who had just crash landed on the island and was trying to find a way to repair his ship. During their very first encounter, she brushes him off rather hastily, but things change when Mega Man rescues her from an aggressive dog. Tron is clearly not used to other people treating her with kindness. She blushes and walks towards Mega Man, but then changes her mind and runs away, warning him to mind his own business!

Eventually, the two find themselves fighting against each other, as Mega Man tries to protect the island from the pirate attack led by Tron. She ??seems surprised to see him again, but also somewhat happy, remarking, "I don't u??nderstand... whenever I think about him, I get this funny feeling..."

Tron and Mega Man begin to develop a competitive relationship, and they always seem excited to see each other again, even though th?ey know that they're going to be fighting. Even when Tron loses to Mega Man, she never feels upset, even though she makes sure to let Mega Man know that she's angry at him for destroying her robots!

In Mega Man Legends 2, Tron tries more directly to get Mega? Man to notice her. She attempts to impersonate Roll Caskett, Mega Man's actual romantic interest, and makes it seem like Roll is saying nasty things to make Mega Man lose trust in her. It doesn't work, and Mega Man finds out that Tron was just fooling him. There's also a humorous part in the gam?e where Mega Man accidentally sees Tron in the buff, as her clothes are apparently singed off of her when her robot is destroyed. Unintentional as it may have been, it still doesn't win over Mega Man's affections.

Nevertheless, Tron continues to follow Mega Man. At the end of the game, Tron is seen working alongside Roll, helping to build plans to rescue Mega Man from the moon. Unfortunately, the relationship between Tron and Mega Man will have to be left to the imagination of the ??fans, as Capcom refused to release the third title in the series. Even though it's pretty obvious that it never would have worked out between them, I still kinda wish they'd get together, if only because Tron is one of the coolest characters ever and I really want to see her happy!

Kanji Tatsumi and Naoto Shirogane - Persona 4

The relationship between Kanji and Naoto is a strange one, to say the least. When Naoto is first introduced, everyone in the game assumes that she is male, judging by her outfit and mann??erisms. She is even introduced as male to ?the player, since the game only uses masculine pronouns when referencing her.

Th?en we have Kanji, who is struggling with his sexual identity after being bullied by his peers for his interest in "feminine" hobbies, such as sewing. It seems like it was mostly girls that bullied him, so he's understandably wary of the female sex for the time being.

Then he meets Naoto, who, being a detective, is interested in having a discussion with him in private, since Naoto ?suspects that Kanji might be the murderer's next target. Kanji completely misinterprets Naoto's intentions, and assumes that she's asking?? him out. He also assumes that she's a boy. Needless to say, a particularly awkward conversation occurs between the two, and it becomes apparent that they're interpreting each other's words completely differently. Kanji seems to be excited about the prospect of dating a boy, but also kind of confused, since he's still not quite sure about his own sexuality.

Later in the game, it's revealed that Naoto is, in fact, a girl. Everyone is shocked! Especially Kanji, I'm sure. However, in another s??urprising twist, Kanji still seems to be very much attracted to Naoto, even though she's actually a girl. He still blushes and clams up when speaking to her, and gets excited at the prospect of seeing her dress up for a beauty pageant. Naoto seems to be aware of Kanji's feelings, but ignores them. Ma?ybe she's playing hard-to-get? Or, more likely, she's not really interested?

Naoto does have room?? for a rela?tionship in her life, though. Since you can have the game's protagonist date most of the female characters in the game, you can choose to be a dick and date Naoto behind Kanji's back. That scenario always made me really uncomfortable though; I never chose to date Naoto either time I played the game. I think the protagonist and Chie make a cuter couple anyway, and that way you're not stabbing your friend in the back. I always hoped Kanji and Naoto could get together, because Kanji would be so happy! But alas, Naoto doesn't seem to share the same feelings...

Monkey and Trip - Enslaved: Odyssey to the West

Of the four relationships in this blog, this one seems the most likely to actually come to fruition. At the beginning of Enslaved, the relationship between Monkey and ??Trip is extremely hostile. This makes sense, as Trip has effectively enslaved Monkey with a headband that makes it possible to control him, so that he'll escort her back home. It's not a very nice thing to do to a person.

As the game progresses, the two become increasingly dependent on each other, and they begin to come to a bit of an understanding. They also begin to develop some sexual tension. At one point in the game, another char??acter, Pigsy, tries to make a pass at Trip, only to be shot down. He then speculates that Trip is more interested in Monkey, and as they sail away on a ship, the junkyard in the background happens to form a heart shape around the two supposed "lovebirds."

Monkey and Trip never profess their feelings for each other outright, but it's pretty obvious how they really feel. When Trip finally disables the headband enslaving Monkey, giving him the opportunity to leave, Monkey instead insis??ts on leaving it on. His reason for doing so is up to interpretation, but I believe he was afraid that, given the option, he might actually choose to leave Trip, even though deep down inside he really wanted to continue accompanying her.

It's possible that, once their adventure was over, they stayed together and formed a deeper, loving relationship. However, the gam??e never explicitly states what happens afterwards, so it's open?? to player interpretation. I like the think they did get together, because I think they'd make a really great couple.

Jeff and Tony - Earthbound

The first time I played Earthbound, I didn't really notice that Tony might think of Jeff as more than just a friend. It's not immediately apparent in the game that Tony might be gay, but it is theorized, since the game's creator, Shigesato Itoi, claimed in an interview that one of the characters in Earthbound is homosexual. Playing the game again with that knowle??????????????????????????dge in mind, you can start ?to pick up on the subtle hints.

When you first talk to him in your dorm room at Snow Wood Boarding School, Tony admits that he was having a dream about taking a walk with Jeff. It's a bit of a strange remark from a friend. Tony then helps Jeff escape from Snow Wood, and seems genuinely sad to see him go, but also understanding. Meanwhile, Jeff says absolutely nothing in response to Tony. You could brush this off as Jeff being a silent protagonist, except he does speak to Ness and th??e other party members occasionally. Just not to Tony.

Later in the game, you come across Tony again, having been kidnapped by aliens and being held in some sort of tank in an underground base, along with a handful of other characters. He is especially excited to see Jeff again, and claims to be Jeff's best friend whi?le talking to Ness and the others.

Towards the end of the game, you? can find a letter from Tony ??addressed to Jeff, which reads:

Dear Jeff,
Everything's really going great here.
I wish I could have gone with you on your adventure, even just part of the way, but instead I'm sitting here,waiting for you in Winters.
I want to see you again as soon as possible.
I can't wait to see your cheerful face.
I bet your glasses are dirty...If you come back, I'll clean them for you!
Like I said, I'm waiting for you.
Yours truly,
Tony
P.S. Don't show this letter to anyone!

There definitely seems to be a little more than friendly feelings being expressed in that letter. You can also sp??eak to Tony at the end of the game, and he complains to Ness that Jeff never calls him, possibly because he's too annoying.

Unfortunately for Tony, Je??ff doesn't seem to be interested. It's also possible that Jeff is completely oblivious to Tony's feelings, and only thinks of him as a friend. I still wish they could have gotten together though... they would have been?? so adorable! Of course, chances are that Tony was barking up the wrong tree anyway, but you never know!

The post Unrequited love: Videogame couples that ne??ver were appeared first on Destructoid.

The modern day version of Romeo & Juliet

Here's the tale of Allan and Nicole, two Miiverse users that fall in love. Watch as this relationship unfolds, from pure innocent intrigue to downright cringe inducing?? heartbreak. And it's all accompani??ed by bad grammar. 

The post A young man discov??ers love and heartbreak on the Miiverse appeared first on Destructoid.

Nothing is over... you just don't turn it off

You know that sudden feeling, that you have to make an important decision that will affect your future in si??gnificant ways, but you don't quite know what the decision is going to be or when you are going to make it? You simply "know"?

I got that feeling around the start of this year. By summer, I understood what had to be done?, but I wanted to push it back as far as I could. Sadly, I can't push it off anymore.

It is with?? a heavy heart that I must bid Dest??ructoid farewell.

This was a tough decision, but I think it's for the best. Destructoid is a well-oiled machine, and though I was happy to be a part of it for a short while, I know the site will be just fine without me. We have a very capable crew that has done amazing things. T?his place is in excellent hands.

When I first started posting on the Cblogs in November 2008, I never knew just?? how much my life would change because of Destructoid. I found a new direction and passion, I made many frien?ds among the staff and the community, and I got to fulfill some of my lifelong dreams.

I remember the third-year anniversary party at the Destructoid HQ, when the site was still based out of Miami, and meeting Hamza Aziz, Dale North, Chad Concelmo, Colette Bennett, and of course Papa N??iero for the first time. I was just a fresh-faced community member at the time, yet they welcomed me like they had known me forever.

I remember attending Anthony Burch and Ashley Davis's wedding in Arizona. I had finally joined the staff after a year and a half of writing, and already two of my fa?vorite editors were moving on to bigger and better things. I'm particularly happy to have met Ashley, as it was her cute yet introspective feature articles that inspired me to give blogging a try in the first place.

I remember my first E3, shacking up in the shadiest Howard Johnson in Koreatown, sharing a room with Max Scoville. Ever since reading about it in Nintendo Power as a kid, E3 seemed like this magical mecca that only the privileged few cou??ld attend. Despite the work and confusion, it was everything I could have hoped for and more.

Then I did it two more times!

I went to Disney World and rode on Peter Pan's Flight with Warren Spector. I interviewed my gaming hero, Keiji Inafune, not once but twice. I met so many of my favori?te artists and personalities. I never imagined I could be so fortunate??.

I thank Niero and the crew for giving me this opportunity. I thank all of you who read my stuff and left comments, positive or negative. And I thank those people who went out of the?ir way to personally tell me how much they? appreciated the work I did and kept coming back to Destructoid because of my posts, especially on those low days when I started thinking that maybe what I was doing lacked any real worth.

I'll miss sharing all my fun and goofy Internet finds with you. I'll miss the chiptunes and music videos. I'll miss bombarding you with more Mega Man fluff than should have been allowed. I know that some folks think that what I posted wasn't "real" news, but I strongly believe that it's as important to celeb??rate videogame fandom as much as videogames themselves. This hobby has touched so many lives in such positive ways that it would be wrong if we don't embrace the lighter?? side. This site alone is proof of that.

I won't disappear completely. I guarantee you'll still s??ee me around these parts. This is just the next stage for me, and who knows where I'll turn up next.

But for now, I'm out.

Peace.

The post Take care, Destructoid, for everlasting peace appeared first on Destructoid.

Mentally unstable love interest? Check!

The adventures of Bravoman, Super-Unequaled Hero of Excellence, continues with the second episode of his new web cartoon. As befo??re, voice actor legend Rob Paulsen is the number one reason to tune in,?? lending his talents to our leading man.

Episode 2 welcomes a new character, Waya Hime, the psycho ninja chick who wants to both date and murder Bravoman. Waya Hime is voice by Romi Dames, who according to Wikipedia voices one of the main characters on the Italian cartoon Winx Club. I don't watch Winx Club nor do I know anyone who does, so I'll l??ook fur??ther down her filmography...

Oh! She was on Bill Nye, the Science Guy! Yeah, let's run with that! Romi Dames, supporting starlet of Bill Nye, the Science Guy!

Bravoman Episode 2: Perky Prin?cess of Pointy Peril [YouTube]

The post Episode 2 of Bravoman is about crazy ninja love appeared first on Destructoid.

New AriaBlarg speed painting is the sweetest thing

Living in the shadow of his older brother, Luigi doesn'?t catch many breaks. But being the big-time hero is not everything in the world. As long as you give it your all, there will always be someone supporting you every step of the way. That's what I get from the Luigi-Daisy pairing. She loves Luigi because, even though he knows he won't match his brother's accomplishments, he never stops fighting for the sake of others??.

This moment of love and sunshine is brought to you by the technicolor-haired AriaBlarg, whose work we've shared in the past. I think her latest commission is jus??t so uplifting -- really strong message there, don't you think? I especially appreciate how she spent a solid minute of fast-forwarde??d time wearing a Bane mask.

AriaBlarg paints!: Luigi! [AriaBlarg and Friends]

The post Daisy loves Luigi simply for who he is appeared first on Destructoid.

Loving tribute (sorta) to EarthBound

Anthony tried to be a big boy -- get married, get a job, move to a new house. But the real world was just too tough for him. With a little prodding from Ash, he realizes that he misses his mommy. But does his? mommy miss him back?

You already know the answer to that question.

This episode of Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin'? is brought to you by EarthBound. The role of Jeff Andonuts is played flawlessly by Papa Burch. All his performances are flawless. Always.

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin'? - Earthbound [GameTrailers]

The post HAWP: Anthony Burch is a big mama’s boy appeared first on Destructoid.

Promoted from our Community Blogs!

_{[Destructoid's own Forums MOMerator Joanna "Zodiac Eclipse" Mueller shares the story of how she and her husband met in Star Wars Galaxies, just in time for Valentine's Day. I hope you packed your toothbrush, because this is the sweetest thing you'll ever read! --Mr Andy Dixon]}

With Valentine's Day upon us, I figured it was finally time to share my own personal tale of love and videogames. As anyone who's ever accidentally brought up the topic of gaming with a significant other while in my presence already knows, I met my husband while playing my first MMORPG: Star Wars Galaxies.

This is our story.

Prior to this time I was an avid console gamer; well, as much as I could be on my limited, college student budget. Aside from compulsively playing The Sims on my laptop whenever I remembered it existed, I spent all my gaming time playing on my beloved PS2. At some point in my college career it was brought to my attention that there were videogames that you could play on the Internet, with other people, all over the world. The idea ?was fascinating. I got myself access to a proper desktop computer and started my investigation.

A friend from work mentioned that pretty much his whole family was addicted to some hotshot new Star Wars game, and being the nerd that I am, I thought it sounded pretty interesting. Not willing to take the plunge on my own, I talked my little brother into getting Star Wars Galaxies and trying it out. (Sin??ce he had actually played som??e MMOs in the past and knew what he was doing.) Once little bro started playing and deemed the game "awesome", I picked up a copy for myself and a new graphics card so I could actually play.

At first, I was completely out of my element. There were suddenly so many buttons to remember and coordinating my movements between the mouse and the keyboard seemed rather daunting. Not to mention that this was "old school" Star Wars Galaxies, which meant that after you created a character the game pretty much j??ust dumped you on a starting planet and left you to figure everything out on your own.

I spent a good deal of time wandering, lost, around the wastes of Tatooine. The idea of playing with strangers was a bit unnerving??, especially when other newbies wanted to challenge me to some PVP, which I've never managed to master. Finally, I got a hold of my brother and told him I was somewhere in the town where all the Womp rats lived, and somehow he managed to narrow that down a bit an??d came to rescue me. It turned out that while I had been mindlessly wandering about, he'd been doing some serious networking and managed to find himself a guild to join.

The guild was situated on Corellia, and was primarily formed of Rebel players. For the next few nights whenever I logged in to play, I was able to easily find someone wandering around the guild tow??n to chat up, ask for advice, or just go hunting with. It was pretty cool, and I was slowly getting into this whole multiplayer thing.

One night, when I met up with my brother for hunting, he introduced me to the town architect, Lukas, who had offered to help u?s do some hunting that night. Since we were both ridiculously low level, the poor guy was essentially babysitting. Eventually, little bro had to go to bed, but after he logged out, Lukas and I just found a hill to chill on and sat around chatting for a bit. He lived halfway around the world in Germany, liked cats, and spoke remarkably good English.

Clearly I was interested in lea??rning more. The next day when I logged on, I went exploring around the town and found his house/shop. I snooped around a bit and bought a candle from his vendor robot.

In retrospect, it was a bit stalkerish.

When he logged on later, he tracked me down and helped me get better situated in the town, since at the time I was logging out on the town hall porch like a squatter. He found me a house that someone was moving out of and even brought over som??e modest furniture so I wasn't just sitting in an empty box.

It didn't take long for Lukas becam?e a major part of pretty much all my in-game milestones. He was there when I finally joined the guild. He bought me my first armor (likely so it was easier to keep me ali??ve on missions). He even got me cool house decorations, like Imperial helmets to line my walls. In between adventuring and hanging out with the guild we would spend hours just talking about anything and nothing.

At this point we hadn't exchanged pictures or anything yet, as I was raised in the days of AOL chatrooms where you didn't tell anyone anything about yourself for fear of virtual rape. As time passed, though, we got to know each other better and he started teaching me German, while I was always available to quickly explain ridiculous America?n idioms to him.

Since Lukas was a master architect, he had a huge house in the tow?n; it put my hand-me-down shack to shame. By this time we were spending nearly all our time together anyway, collecting trophies and exploring, so I guess I shouldn't have been too surprised when he invited me to live with him. Even in-game I recognized this as a big step, but I decided I could afford to indulge myself; I'd secretly always had a thing for guys with accents.

We started chatting on messenger when we weren't in-game and basically structured our lives around fitting as much time together as possible. At some point he told me that he loved me. It took some time for me to come to terms with it, but I was falling just as hard for him. The first time I ever told him I loved him I did it right before I logged out for the night. Basically, "I love you!" <Disconnected>. Bravery was not my strong suit.

While he was offline for a bit dealing with finding a new place to li??ve and setting up more steady work, I had a lot of time to myself to wander around the gameworld and try to figure out what I wanted to do with this whole, "guy halfway?? around the world, who I only know through a videogame, is quickly becoming my best friend / possible soul mate" issue.

By the time Lukas finally came back to ??the game with some regularity I decided to just see where this crazy thing was going. We became inseparable. Our characters got married in-game. It was quite the event for the guild and all of our friends pitched in to help get the chapel ready and everyone properly outfitted for the grand event. My brother actually gave me ?away at the in-game wedding, and my fingers were shaking as I typed out my vows. What had started out as a game had lead to some extremely real feelings between us.

We set up a few summer homes on Naboo, since it was our favorite planet to visit. We were still in the guild, but spent less and less time back on Corellia. Over time, the game changed a lot. The developers were under pressure to compete with the WoW juggernaut and made many questionabl??e changes to the way the game was played to streamline the experience. Veteran players were not pleased and all hell broke loose several times over.

Through it all Lukas and I stayed together and started making plans to meet in person. In February of 2005 I made my first ever intercontinental flight to spend two weeks with him in Germany. Despite everyone at work warning me that I'd likely be sent back in Ziploc baggies, things went great and instead I came home engaged. We spent th??e next months jumping the immigration hurdles until at last Lukas was able to finally come "home". We got married in October of 2005 and have been happily gaming together ever since.

Our current setup is a motley folding table where we have ou?r gaming PCs set side-by-side in the room we've dubbed the "Nerd Cave". It makes for some great co-op moments when we can just glance over at each other's monitor and see where we are needed. We're hoping someday when our son is old enough to get him a setup so we can all play together.

Sadly, Star Wars Galaxies didn't have such a happy ending. The game was officially shut down back in 2011. Even though we hadn't played for years it was still sad to see the game that brought us together gone for good. We've played many other MMOs since then, but we've never managed to find one that had the same community feeling of SWG. Maybe we never will.

But I can honestly say I wouldn't take b?ack those years spent grinding XP, leveling, and loving, for anything.

_{[Art by Mikey Turvey]}

The post Finding my true love in Star Wars Galaxies appeared first on Destructoid.

Still think love conquers all?

Valentine’s Day inspires a variety of emotions. While love is in the air for many, cupid has more sinister plans for a select few. A poor Valentine's Day f??or an average person might include seeing a movie alone or a solitude induced weep-fest. For the videogame characters below, the luxury of loneliness is miniature in comparison.

Take ??a look at ten relationships gone awry in the worst ways possib?le.

Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater – Big Boss and Eva

Love can blossom anywhere. If the Metal Gear series has taught us anything (besides the usefulness of a cardboard box) it is that romance is especially prominent on the battlefield. Why would bullets, explosions, and a team of evil super soldiers deter one from in??dulging in a little affection?

While Big Boss fought off Eva’s motive-driven advances, he was unable to resist her overt feminine charm indefinitely. After a romantic encounter complete with wine, a fireplace, and a bear skin rug, Eva skipped town, leaving the battle-hardened veteran heart-broken and empty handed. I ??guess Snake would've been better off sticking with his M1911A1.

Final Fantasy 10 – Tidus and Yuna

Ah, there’s nothing sweeter than teenage love. Combining raging hormones with ??the responsibility of saving a world tormented by perpetual death is certainly a unique formula for passion. During the?ir pilgrimage to defeat the ever-returning nightmare Sin, Tidus and Yuna found romance as a convenient way to ignore the foreboding reality of their quest: Yuna&rsquo;s death.

Throughout a s??eries of plot twists and extensive battle?s, players save Yuna from her sinister fate. Too bad the protagonist Tidus turns out to be from a dream world and disappears into a poof of nothingness.

Dead Space – Isaac and Nicole

The horror genre isn't ideal for heartfelt connections. The closest that scary games often get to featuring physicality is through a zombie bite to the neck. Too bad no one sent the memo to Isaac Clark. What started as a standard repair job on the intergalactic mining vessel the USG Ishimura, quickly turned into a terrifyin?g test of survival among reanimated corpses and alien monsters.

Did I mention that his girlfriend Nicole was stationed aboard the ship? I’m sure you know where this is going. Not only does the poor systems engineer discover that his? girlfriend has been dead since before his arrival, he develops mental instability causing him to see visions of her, courtesy of an alien artifact. Thanks, Nicole, insanity is a perfect?? parting gift.

Infamous - Cole and Trish

There are very few actions in life that cannot be forgiven. Being held responsible for an explosion that wiped out a chunk of a city, killing thousands, would definitely be one of those unforgivable moments. Ever since The Blast, Cole's relations??hip with his girlfriend Trish took a turn for the worst. Blaming him for the death of her sister, Cole became a monster in her eyes.

In an effort to win back her trust, the now super-powered hero went above and beyond to assist Trish and the citizens of Empire City. Just as affections were beginning to turn around, Trish was kidnapped, forcing Cole to make a difficult choice. Save the love of his life, or save a team of doctors; serve his personal desires or act on behalf of the greater good. Either way, Cole is pretty much screwed. Choose Trish and she spends her last dying breath describing how much she despises what Cole has become. Rescue the doctors and Tr??ish praises his decision yet still dies from her injuries. Lose-lose situation is an understatement.

Final Fantasy VII – Cloud and Aerith

What does a spiky-haired soldier, an innocent flower girl , and a well-endowed bartender have in common? In the boring arena of reality, absolutely nothing. Within the fiction of?? videogames however, the trio arguably represent the most notable love triangle in the gaming world. Regardless of who the player chooses to pursue as a romantic interest, Aerith or Tifa, fate intervenes in? the cruelest way possible.

A scene of tranquility is instantly transformed into the epitome of shock, alarm, and terror. While praying at an alter, the silver-haired villain Sephiroth seemingly appears from the heavens and impales Aerith with his eight-foot-long Masamune. In an instant she is gone, collapsed in Cloud's arms. To hit the point home, Aerith's theme song begins to play in the background, and the reality that Final Fantasy VII actually had the audacity to kill off ?a main character halfway through the game, is fully realized.

Mass Effect 3 – Commander Shepard and Romantic Partner

Saving the galaxy from sentient machines may seem like a tall order, but after three installments of the Mass Effect series, it's pretty safe to say that Commander Shepard always finds a solution. Whether through diplomacy or a firefight, humanity's savior has proven to go above and beyond the call of duty. This applies both on and off the battlefield. Seducing a slew of men, women, and alien crew mates is all fine and good, but the end of the world has a way of offering a sobering reminder as to what is at stake. There will be no civilian life for Sh??epard and her partner; no white picket fence and no blue children. Ensuring the survival of the entire galaxy is not a job that one simply comes back from. All that can be said between the larger-than-life figure and her significant other is a somber goodbye before the true suicide mission commences.

At the end of Mass Effect 3, the hero alone ventures into the depths of the Reaper operated Citadel. The first human Spectre is given a choice that will forever alter the course of the galaxy, to end the cycle of destruction that has continued in secret for millennia. Ultimately, Shepard's decision opens a new chapter for t??he galaxy, while putting an end to her own. Whether truly dead or not, Commander Shepard's closest squadmate is forced to hang her name on th?e Normandy SR2's memorial wall. In an act of remembrance signifying Shepard the soldier, the legend, and the human being. 

Shadow of the Colossus – Wander and Mono

Love has the power to transform a young man into a hero; a vigilant civilian into a seasoned warrior. In? the case of Wander, the desire to revive his romantic interest Mono, inspires him to commit a laundry list of questionable choices. Stealing an ancient sword is risky yet understandable. Entering a forbidden land is yet another precarious decision. But following the instructions of an ominous, obviously evil, being is a step in the wrong direction. Whether due to naivety or injudiciousness, Wander proceeds to slay 16 enormous colossi in the hope that his new "ally" will reawaken the beloved maiden.

Instead, the sinister lord Dormin possesses his body, transforming Wander into darkness incarnate. In the end, Mono successfully opens her eyes and returns to the land of the living. Wander, however, regresses to the age of an infant, marked with horns upon his head to signify a curse. As the only bridge connecting the forbidden land from the rest of the world falls, only Mono, altered Wander, and his trusty steed Agro remain. The two are together again, yet they are worlds apart. Alive but isola?ted in a land of danger and mystery.

The Darkness - Jackie and Jenny

Hit man with a heart of gold may seem like an oxymoron, but in the case of Jackie Estacado, the seemingly opposing identities are more than true. After the death of his parents at a young age, Jackie was sent off to a??n orphanage where he met the love of his life, Jenny Romano. Their childhood friendship blossomed into an adult romance; a relationship seemingly too good to be true. Unfortunately, Jackie's profession would be the factor to catalyze the sudden change from conjugal bliss to marital tragedy.

On the eve of his 21st birthday, Jackie was targeted in an assassination attempt by his own organization due to fears that he was attempting to take over the Franchetti Family. In an effort to shake Jackie at his core, Don Uncle Paulie kidnaps Jenny and travels to the orphanage from their youth. Jackie arrives in a homecoming of sorts to witness his enemies berating Jenny. ??In a scene of absolute helplessness,  the Darkness seizes Jackie's body, preventing him from intervening as the Don raises his gun to Jenny's face. Boom. Jenny crumples to the floor and the antagonists escape. Even through suicide, Jackie is unable to find peace. The Darkness cannot live without its host, and thus he returns to the land of the living, f??orced to continue his existence as a pawn of the malevolent being.

Gears of War 2 – Dom and Maria

Battling for humanity’s survival against a horde of reptilian humanoids may seem like a challenging feat, but the steroid-pumped, macho men of Gears of War claim otherwise. Corporal Dominic “Dom” Santiago, one of the el??ite soldiers chosen to fight against the Locust, is forced to not only deal with the hardships of war, but also with an internal struggle fueled by the death of his children and disappearance of his wife Maria.

When news is received about her ??whereabouts, Dom trudges through hordes of alien forces to her rescue. The good news is Dom finds his wife alive.? The bad news is she is malnourished, scarred, and mentally broken from the torment of slave labor. In the ultimate display of love, Dom ends her suffering with a single bullet to the head. Damn.

God of War – Kratos and Lysandra

Kr?atos may be Sparta’s most prominent ladies man, boasting encounters with countless women and even the Goddess of Love, but he wasn’t always the king of promiscuity. Before the demigod was known to partake in threesomes with advanced button-pressing sequences, he was a devoted husband and father. In a desperate move during a losing battle, the Spartan devoted his allegiance to the god of war Ares in return for victory against enemy Barbarian tribes.

Through a twist of fate fueled by Kratos’s thirst for power, he was tricked by Ares to raid a nearby village. Blinded by Ares' power,  Kratos slaughtered every man, woman, and child in the village, including his own wife Lysandra and child Calliope. If that wasn’t enough, Kratos was cursed by a village oracle, forcing him to forever wear the ashes of his dead family on his skin. From that day forward, Kratos became known as The Ghost of Sparta; and ever since then, God of War ha?s represented one of the most depressin?g love stories in videogames.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------?-----------??--------------

What is? your favorite videogame romance? Have you ever ?felt moved or saddened by gaming love affairs gone wrong?

The post Roses and tears: 10 depressing videogame romances appeared first on Destructoid.

Romance AND videogames? Heck yes.

_{Taylor is an avid gamer, sushi lover, and overall nerd. After founding two gaming-related sites of her own, she went on to intern with G4, and can now be found across the interwebs writing about videogames of all kinds.}

At least one day a year, petty squabbles among coupl??es take a back seat in the name of love. While birthdays and anniversaries are special, there is arguably no occasion more romantic than Valentine's Day. The term love conquers all might elicit apathetic sentiments 364 days a year but on that one special day in mid-February, those dreamy, heartwarming emotions are as real as ever.

An intrinsic dilemma arises. When words don't suffice, how does you show your special someone that they love them? The average guy or gal might be satisfied with?? a shiny new watch, a fancy necklace, or even a meager gift of socks; but gamers on the other hand, have a luxury of being bit more creative. Here are five twists on the traditional romance formula with ways to show a gamer how you feel this Valentine's Day.

1. Breakfast and controller in bed.

Mornings often reflect the epitome of stress; a battle against the clock?? thrusting dreary souls out into the unforgiving cold, all under the guise of necessity. Often enacted as a dai??ly skirmish against the alarm clock or a misguided affair with the snooze button, the essence of get-up-and-go is undoubtedly hard to come by. Perhaps the most gratifying gifts that one could offer would be to transform that frantic morning hustle into a relaxing videogame inspired reprieve?

Breakfast in bed with a side of videogames represe??nts the trifecta of happiness: comfort, relaxation, and entertainment. Wrapped in a bundle of absolute joy, no mortal could deny the pleasure of munching down scrambled eggs and toast, with controller in hand, and eyes fixed upon the TV screen. Grant your loved one the gift of game time??, in the most absolutely wonderful way possible.

2. Complement your valentine's gaming hobby with a custom controller.

There are a multitude of tools that we depend on in ??our work lives. Carpenters are relian??t upon a trusty set of power tools, and a film crew would be lost without expensive recording equipment. For the average gamer, the necessary tool of the trade is none other than the controller. With a few analog sticks and a handful of buttons, a gamer is able to take charge of any situation. Commanded to defeat a dark overlord? Easy. Trusted to free an entire kingdom? No problem. How about saving a princess? I'd like to see a wrench do that.

After years of button mashing, control-stick grinding, and perhaps a few rage-induced slams to the floor, the closes??t thing that many will get to holding a gun, sword, or magic lance often shows its age. Rather than r??eplacing an old controller with a standard model, invest in a custom version and kick Valentine's Day up to epic levels. Personalize the device with your loved one's favorite colors, patterns, or decals, and you're sure to impress your beloved. Not to mention, with a gift like that, your partner will certainly be willing to share.

3. Make your partner a home cooked meal ... with videogame flair.

In the words of famous playwright George Bernard Shaw, "There is no love more sincere than the love of food." Take out is great and fast food gets the job done, but there is undoubtedly something special about a dish prepared from scratch with the ultimate flavor enhancer, love. How does one describe the savory, unctuous delight o?f a home cooked meal? From first glance the senses explode in a frenzy; aromas envelop one's being as eyes lock on the gastronomical marvel. Mouth salivates, brain revs in anticipation, and stomach awaits a close encounter of the culinary kind.

Successfully delivering a sensory explosion of this nature will easily earn you 100 bonus points with your significant other, but as a gamer, 100 measly points just isn't enough. We've explored every inch of Skyrim, unlocked ultimate weapons in the realm of Final Fantasy, and built impressive achievement and trophy lists while amassing loads of virtual gold, coins, and rupees. Going the extra mile is what we do. Add a videogame inspired food item to the party, and the real-life celebration will be complete. Show your sweetheart that you can get your Cooking Mama on while embracing the hobby that they hold dear. A litt??le bit of creativity goes a long way, and a Pac-Man cupcake is sure to make this Valentine's Day memorable for all the right reasons.

4. Plan a special trip for the two of you ... to a videogame convention.

Taking a trip with a romantic partner often?? signifies a noteworthy milestone in a couple's relationship. You trust your significant other enough ?to showcase your post-nighttime bed head, and they trust you enough to spend more than 24 hours by your side. Armed with the fluttery sentiments of love, an island getaway might be the first notion to enter your thoughts. Your sweetheart might thank you, but your wallet sure won't. How memorable can sunbathing really be anyway?

It might be impossible to agree with that special someone over politics or religion, but if you're dating a gamer, videogames are always a sure bet. Skip the tropical oasis and buy two tickets to a gaming convention instead. You'll still be able to achieve a level of romance in between events an??d exhibits, while managing to satiate your partner's inner nerd, geek, or game enthusiast at the same time. Not to mention, couple cosplay is always an option. Master Chief and Cortana anyone??

5. Have a couple's night in, cuddle up, and play co-op together.

When a couple must manage the rigors of daily life: school, work and kids, paired with a cultural emphasis on conspicuous consumption, it can become easy to forget that a relaxing night at home is not only an option, but a fun alternative to the constant flow of dinner outings and movie dates. The fast-paced lives that many of us lead can act as a?n uninvited buffer between two people actually enjoying each other's company. If there is one day to step up and break the mold of an archetypal weekday evening, it's on Valentine's Day.

Instead of dealing with hassle-filled dinner reservations, spend the night at home with your special someone and bond over a shared hobby of videogames. Playing together might be a rare treat, making it all the more memorable when you can successfully devote an hour or two to Valentine's Day co-op. There's nothing quite like bonding over surviving a horde of zombies together in Dead Island, or tag-team chainsawing an enemy alien in Gears of War.?? Despite the probable gory subject matter of the games you'll be playing, don't make ??that an excuse not to cuddle together in the name of Cupid.

 --------------------------------------??----------------------------------------------------------------?------

Diamonds might be a girl's best friend, but any gamer male or female can appreciate a gift that facilitates, encourages, and promotes their pastime of gaming. It is rare to be taken seriously as a gamer; we're instantly typified along a stringent line of negativity. With so much antagonism or simple misunderstanding within the genera?l populace, having someone by your side who understands the thrill of saving Hyrule for the umpteenth time, is priceless.

You might criticize Valentine's Day for being a commercial holiday or sulk at its? arrival for other reasons, but if love and videogames could find a middle ground, maybe it would be worth giving a chance after all? Trust me, roses and chocolates get old fast. Why not break free from the traditional boring offerings and give your significant other something that they'd really enjoy this Valentine's day?

_{[Images courtesy of Bitmob, Rolf Venema, Vox Efx, Echo.Plexus, Game Set Watch, and Feast of Fiction.]}

The post Top five ways for a gaming couple to bond appeared first on Destructoid.

Valentine's Day-themed pages from MM #22

We take a break from the Sonic / Mega Man joygasm festivities to remind you that on February 13 -- the day before Valentine's Day coincidentally -- Archie Mega Man #22 hits shelves. It's the requisite "love" issue, in which Roll plays matchmaker to get Mega and Quake Woman together, while Ice Ma?n tries his best to express his feelings for Roll.

Yeah, here's the thing...

The MM1 Robot Maste?rs were built by Dr. Light, which means they are as much brothers to Mega as Mega is to Roll. Technically Ice Man and Roll are siblings, which makes the entire premise ??of this particular chapter more than a little awkward.

Maybe I'm blowing this out of pr??oportion and it's all harmless fun. Or maybe Archie writer Ian Flynn is lot naughtier than I gave him cred??it for.

The post The Mega Man comic explores awkward robot love appeared first on Destructoid.

Give that meat a nice, firm squeeze

"A beating heart" was the theme of this year's Global Game Jam -- an event held in various sites around the world simultaneously where participants have to design a game in 48 hours. And among all the submissions, Heart to Get by the team of Menno Deen, Luuk Waarbroek, Mitch Leeuwe, Rob Tieben, Jan Oonk, and Mark van Kuijk went waaaaaay outside the box.

The PC / Mac game involves two teams that each control a squishy heart-like creature. The blue creature is ?trying to catch up and make love to the pink creatu?re, while pink wants to keep as far away from blue as possible. Teammates move their critter by simulating a beating heart.

This is done by squeezing long, thick ?slabs of meat.

You can't just pound away at your meat. You've got to be gentle. Apply pressure with a firm yet loving grip. Find your rhythm and get tha??t blood pumping, but don't?? get too excited or you'll make a mess. Be in sync with your partner; don't be selfish and only think about your own satisfaction.

Innuendo.

Game: Heart to get! [Global Game Jam]

The post Thi??s is a game?? you play by literally beating your meat appeared first on Destructoid.